The compassion of communication

I am always amazed at how difficult it is to achieve true and responsible communication. What is your experience with communication?

One of the people I admire is Marshall Rosenberg. He has devoted his life’s work to creating a language of compassion. Such a language is essential. Every nurse knows that compassion is the essence of presencing. Effective nursing response to the needs and requests of patients can only be achieved through observation and awareness. Such a simple concept can become so complicated in the frenetic world of a hospital, outpatient clinic or surgery center.

There is a life energy that creates needs, values, desires and expectations. Nurses, as a rule, are sensitive to that energy. I often wonder how nurses communicate their needs in places they work. When needs aren’t met, there is discontent and disconnection. If needs, as Rosenberg defines them, are met, I suspect people are largely satisfied with the work they do, and that they find purpose, meaning and connection with others in their daily activities. Nonviolent communication creates human connections that empower compassionate giving and receiving.

Are your needs being met? Are the needs of your patients, peers, colleagues and family members being met? Check out the needs inventory proffered by Rosenberg. Connection, meaning, physical well-being, autonomy, peace, honesty, play and peace are indicators of needs we have that energize us. In contrast, review the feelings inventory that Rosenberg and his colleagues have developed which indicate when needs are not being met. If you are a generative leader and are sensitive to your needs and the needs of others, you are more likely to have an open heart, will and mind and will know how best to develop compassion through communication.

You may also be interested in learning more about the American Academy for Communication in Health Care. The goal of this organization is to transform health care by helping people relate more effectively.

How compassionate is your communication? What needs and feelings do you experience daily? How will you use resources around you to communicate more effectively and, by using your compassionate communication skills, make a difference in the nursing care you provide?

For Reflections on Nursing Leadership, published by the Honor Society of Nursing, Sigma Theta Tau International.